After every child I’ve had, and at pivotal moments in my professional career, I’ve shed a heavy layer of my ego. Why is this so painful? Its like dying. Or at least a part of you dies. A part of you that no longer serves you and can never return simply because of the revelation of a new truth. In motherhood, caring for children is absolutely relentless. Then some of us also have to work outside the home and relinquish some of the daily duties to another caregiver, which can either feel crushing or liberating. Some of us are wives and have to be emotionally available for our spouses. Some of us run or participate in non-profits or charitable organizations. Some of us home school our children. Some of us care for children or parents with disabilities. As new parents at 25-30 something, we are caring for the future of our society in our children, and the past in our parents as well as the current state of society. How will we ever match these colliding worlds? How does what we do as mothers affect the world our children will live in? The weight of the world past, present and future is truly on our shoulders. RAW sums up how I feel at the end of the day. I have nothing left to pretend my life is any different than it is. I do notice the stares, sometimes glares and scoffs of others who may not understand why my children aren’t wearing shoes, or why their hair hasn’t been brushed. I promise you, shoes were put on at one time during the day. I don’t have the energy to put them on 1,000 times, even if you think its my duty to do so. To sum it up, the world is lucky if I’m wearing pants! I have no energy left to pretend things are different then exactly what you see. I have no choice to be anything else but painfully and chaotically authentic. I need the worlds support to raise these precious children, not the other way around. In a perfectly beautiful and messy way, this way of life is preciously free. I don’t have to try to fit the expectations of the world… because I simply can’t do it. So there you have it. RAW is my love note to motherhood, the painfully precious archetype which has fully encompassed and saved my soul.